Just Plain Chips

Alright, I’ve just got a few random things to get out of my mind.

A couple of nice things about watching the Vikings yesterday was that I was hanging out with a couple of friends while watching and they had the game in HD. Of course, being in HD just made all the suckitude that much more crisp and clear. Kind of like being able to watch someone vomit in smell-o-vision, there was just that extra bit to make it hurt a little more.

At one point Chris and I were discussing how nearly 100% of announcers are either idiots or are plain annoying or both. Not 10 minutes after that, the color guy for the Vikings game started talking about how poor the Vikings were playing and how they just didn’t even seem like the Vikings. They were the “Diet Vikings”. All of us had a hearly laugh at that. And we had to partially rescind our comment about all announcers being bad. Of course later in the game this same announcer coughed straight into his live microphone right as the game was coming back from a commercial. That was the second most entertaining moment of the game for a Vikings fan though.

So I went to lunch at Subway today and I went there at maybe 12:15 or 12:20 with the idea to get there after the initial rush. Mistake I got there 10 seconds before the height of the line length. Oh well. The most exciting moment of waiting in line was when my friend Allison from Texas walked in the front door. I was taken aback for a moment until I realized that Allison had not taken a supersonic flight up from Austin after emailing me this morning and that this was in fact a different girl who had similarities in her profile.

Anyway, that’s about it. Ciao.

When the going gets tough, Brenden gets joking. Trying to be funny and joking about things is my defense mechanism against things that are just too serious or sad. And since I’m not inherently all that funny, I glean what I can from other sources. Normally these other sources are TV or movie quotes.

My mom and I met my brother Matt for lunch the other day and we were talking about New Orleans and Katrina. Matt said something about how people are wondering if they should even rebuild the city being below sea level and in such a precarious spot. I hadn’t thought of it before but what popped into my head was a scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail. The King of the Swamp is explaining to his son, Prince Herbert, about what he’ll inheret one day…

King of the Swamp:

Listen, lad. I built this kingdom up from nothing. When I started here, all there was was swamp. Other kings said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built it all the same, just to show ‘em. It sank into the swamp. So, I built a second one. That sank into the swamp. So, I built a third one. That burned down, fell over, THEN sank into the swamp. But the fourth one stayed up! And that’s what you’re gonna get, lad. The strongest castle in these islands.

Of course, it’s much funnier to hear it with the accent and all of the inflections in the movie. Or if you’re my mom, to hear me say it with the accent and all of the inflections.

I’m not sure if they should or shouldn’t rebuild New Orleans. I have a sneaking suspicion that they’re going to rebuild it. But I did find it funny to compare it to the King of the Swamp in The Holy Grail. Maybe that makes me shallow, but I think it just makes me human.

Don’t you hate gawker slowdowns? Don’t you hate when you’re just as guilty as everyone else?

What is our facination with everything but the road in front of us? Do we think that our lives will be enriched if we can catch a glimpse of a mangled body beside an accident site? Do we really have to try and figure out why the guy over there is in cuffs?

I can’t answer any of those questions. But I was in a very unique (to me) gawker slowdown last night. My brother, my mom, and I were heading down 494 towards the TGI Fridays near the MoA to meet Matt and Jenny and the kids and my dad for dinner before Brian flew back to LA. As we drove by the Best Buy Headquarters up in the sky we saw a 747 (or possibly an Airbus A340) just floating above our heads. It had just taken off from the airport and was slowly turning to it’s route. It was obvious that no one on the road (which had been moving very nicely for 5:45pm) could keep their eyes off of it as the speed dropped significantly. Of course I didn’t mind because I couldn’t keep my eyes off of it either. A plane that big as low as it was looked pretty darn impressive and it just looked like it was turning impossibly slowly and that it should just be falling out of the sky.

It was neat.

Here in the United States we go to the doctor to get “shots”. I guess in the UK they go and get “jabs“.

“Annual flu jab” just sounds kind of funny to me. But I suppose that’s because I live in the Colonies. I find it facinating how languages can start out in the same place and diverge so much under different influences.

I know at least one person from “Hicksville, USA” as she puts it. And I know there are a lot of small town people out there who say they’re from the same place.

But aren’t you glad you’re not actually from Hicksville? Hicksville, NY, that is. (If you’re from Hicksville, NY, I’m sorry)

When I went to the U, we always called it “the U“, knowing full well that it wasn’t the only U in the world or the US. It’s not even the only U of M. The guys on ESPN’s NFL Tonight always refer to the University of Miami as “the U”. I think mainly because Michael Irvin went there and the insignia on their football helmets is a big “U”. But I’ve seen stories in newspapers (even other than the Strib or Pioneer Press) and on sports websites calling the University of Minnesota “the U“.

But just because I was curious I searched for “the U” (in quotes) on google today and what should come up as the first hit? Why, the U’s website. Just like the proof that I’m a doctor google’s high ranking proves that my U is the U

This is a message to all of my friends of leaden feet. To my friends who love the exhilaration of high speed. To my friends who don’t know the meaning of the words “Speed Limit”.

Have you seen the cops out there this week? I don’t know about your towns but in Eden Prairie they are out in force. For the last couple of weeks I’ve been seeing EP police on Valley View Road on my way home. But this last week there have been lots and lots out on 212 and Hwy 5. My dad saw a speed trap on Shady Oak and 212 and I saw about 3 squad cars on short drives this morning.

Oh, and on our way home from Apple Valley last night there were 5 squad cars on Cedar/77 just south of the Mall of America. The funny thing was that there were Minnapolis and Airport squad cars. I’m not sure how the whole “jurisdiction” thing works, but it didn’t seem quite right.

I’m not saying they’re everywhere. I’m just saying be on the lookout.

This is a followup to my post on real probability.

My brother Brian and I, when we lived together in Bozeman, read a lot of interesting books and talked about a lot of interesting topics. A couple of books that I remember being the most interesting covered such diverse topics as chaos theory, time, and quantum mechanics.

Something I remember reading about was called quantum tunneling. What that is, in simple terms that most people (like me) still won’t understand, is basically the phenomemon of electrons showing up in energy states that they shouldn’t be in. There is a certain small probability that the electron will “break through” an energy barrier and end up in a state that it normally shouldn’t be in.

Because of my lack of understanding and reading too much into some of the analogies that were given to explain the concept I had this idea that actual atoms could tunnel through physical barriers, instead of electrons through an energy barrier. Brian and I immediately expounded on the idea.

Read whole post…

I went on another run today, hooray for me. It went pretty darn well, if I do say so myself. Another 2 miles. I felt good except for a couple of spots where I could feel the orange juice sloshing around inside me. No OJ for me before I do any exercise, I guess. It wasn’t even as if I got up, had breakfast, and ran right out the door. There was some time between eating and running. But, it’s always good to learn those little things about yourself.

I’m sure you’ve seen vehicles driving around (or even parked) that have the logo of some company emblazoned somewhere on the side or back. What great advertising right? A moving billboard seen by the thousands upon thousands of drivers that always seem to be on Minnesota’s roadway system.

The problem starts when trying to figure out what kind of car to have your name put on. Idealy you would want something that “matches” your business and your clientelle, right? Does that seem reasonable?

Read whole post…

Holy crap. I know professional cyclists wear crazy uniforms sometimes, but this is rediculous. Of course, this is just hilarious.

I almost forgot. When I was at CONvergence I had some pocky. They were little chocolate sticks and they were yummy.

I don’t remember where I first heard about pocky, but I remember wondering what it was. I finally found out a couple of weeks ago. I found out it was tasty.

Are you female?
Can you drive?
Are you 21?
Do you look younger than 21?
Do you like buying alcohol?

Then sign up now for our newest study on alcohol behavior in America. We will give you a rental car, a cell phone to use, and a bunch of cash. Your job is to drive around Chicago buying alcohol and reporting back on what happens; telling us who asks for ID and who doesn’t. You will be compensated for your time.

One of my coworkers is going down to Chicago this weekend with his wife who is helping administer this very study/survey. How crazy is that?

It’s not often that I wish I was a young looking, 21 year old female, but I did for a couple seconds today. That sounds like a fun job.

I posted about the Gorillaz single “Feel Good Inc” the other day. I did a little looking into the Gorillaz and found that it is a “virtual band” put together by Jamie Hewlett, the creator of the Tank Girl comic, and Damon Albarn, who was the lead singer of Blur.

Blur was a Britpop band that never really made it big in the US except for two singles that only did okay: “Boys and Girls” and “Song 2″. What is interesting is that they had a big rivalry with Oasis which they had the upper hand on a number of times, but Oasis made it big in the US while Blur never amounted to anything over here. You may remember Oasis’s album “(What’s the Story) Morning Glory?” or the fun arguments between bandmate brothers Noel and Liam Gallagher.

I remember hearing Blur’s “Song 2″ in the computer video game FIFA 98: Road to the World Cup (which also introduced me to The Crystal Method). A buddy of mine at the U, Matt Suchomel, was a big Blur fan and let me listen to one of Blur’s albums, “Parklife”, which had hit #1 in the UK. I thought the album was quite good and ended up buying a copy of my own. I still own it and still enjoy listening to it. It is one of those albums where I like nearly every song.

This was my junior year of school and I lived with a member of the swimming team. This basically meant that I was friends with what seemed like half of the swimming team, both the guys and girls. I know it probably wasn’t that many but Gary and I had his team members over all of the time. For a few of the ladies a popular entertainment was listening to me sing “Boys and Girls” in my best British accent. They’d ask me to sing it all of the time, either I’d be singing it or we’d have the album playing on the stereo. My buddy Matt often wondered aloud “Where were these kinds of fans when the album was released and later when they were crushed by Oasis?”. Alas for fans of Blur.

So that’s one of my random memories from college. Singing Blur songs to a bunch of female collegiate swimmers.

I don’t know how many iPod commercials there are…oops, I didn’t until 5 seconds ago when I found the ad page on apple.com. There are two of them.

The one I liked the most was “Rollerskating”. Until yesterday I had always wondered what song was playing in the commercial as I thought it was cool. (of course had I searched for the Apple page I just came across I could have found out much earlier) The song happens to be Feel Good Inc by the Gorillaz. One of my friends had the album going in his car yesterday and I’ve had the song in my head pretty much ever since. It’s got an awesome bass line and some groovy beats. The video is also quite cool. I can’t vouch for the rest of the album, but that song is awesome.

Happy Independence Day.

For those of you in the UK still calling us “The Colonies”, get over it, it’s been 229 years. (though only about 222 years since the end of the war.)

Today is beautiful. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, there’s a light breeze in the air. Sounds like the perfect day for the whole family to head to Matt and Jenny’s house for hotdogs on the grill and swimming in the pool.

The other day I mentioned a couple of nice cars I saw on my way home from lunch. Someone made a snide comment ;) about where I live and work.

Well…today, on my way out of the parking lot of Culver’s my dad and I saw something even nicer parked out front of a fast food kebob restaurant. It was a Ferrari Spyder, not unlike this one. Pretty nice, pretty nice indeed.

Well, maybe not Germans, but German automobiles. On my way back to the office from lunch at Culvers (I love their concrete frozen custard malts) I stopped at a stop light. Instead of noticing a Japanese car trying to be German I noticed a fine German vehicle in front of me. Nothing like the Maybach Steve, Linzy, and I saw at the theater, but a respectable Mercedes Benz S55 AMG, I’m thinking about a 2002 model year. “Wow”, I thought, “Those are quite nice, and likely expensive.” Though not as expensive as a brand new one. Indeed, while $55K-$60K isn’t necessarily the most exhorbitant car price around, it’s on the upper end of the scale. When the light turned green I glanced up in my rearview mirror and what should I notice? But a shiny Porsche! The Germans had me surrounded. (I didn’t look to my right to see if there was a VW or Audi over there) Once we got on the free way I was able to discern that the Porsche in my sights was a 2003 911 Turbo, still worth a hefty $95-$100K. To be sure, that’s less than the $130K you’d pay for a brand new one, but still a lot. My little black Honda was feeling very inadequate for a little bit. But I cranked the stereo and peeled around a corner when I got closer to work to make it feel better.

This morning on my way to work I pulled up behind a Honda Accord at a stop light. Like many cars it had a little sticker telling where it had been purchased. The funny thing was that this Honda had been purchased at the Honda Motorwërks.

This struck me as odd for a couple of reasons, which I will now describe. To me, there is no obvious reason for spelling your company’s name like that, because it is stupid. I can only imagine that the owner or founder wanted a more German looking name, because the German’s make good cars.

Umlauts are diacratic marks used in the German language (and others). And “motorwerks” is basically somewhere where engines or cars are made, specifically in Germany, as it is a German word. Umlauts have long been used as a “special effect”, mainly in the names of heavy metal bands, to make the name look “tougher”.

Here is where the problems arise. First of all, there are no umlauts over e’s in German, only a’s, o’s, and u’s. So there is no such word as “motorwërks” and it doesn’t really have a pronunciation. Second, the owner must have seen other car dealerships that had “Motorwerks” in their names and thought it was cool. Unfortunately they were probably BMW dealerships. Which was okay for them because “Motorwerks” is an English-ized version of “Motoren Werke” which is what the MW in BMW stands for (the B stands for Bayerische, ie Bavarian).

Oh, and last, but certainly not least, Hondas are Japanese cars. I won’t mention the most famous historical partnership Japan and Germany share, but it isn’t cars and it isn’t language.

Anyway, I always laugh at rediculous marketing rïdiculous markëting (thanks boys).

I had a couple of “interesting” things to post about. But as I was writing them up, they struck me as exceedingly boring and stupid, even for me. So you get nothing.

Edit: After reading Steve’s comment and re-reading my post, I guess this does come off a bit more bitter than I would have liked. When I wrote “So you get nothing” I was saying it in my head like Sgt. Schultz says “I know nothing” on Hogan’s Heroes, so in more of a light hearted tone.